...only seems backwards.
i feel like sometimes i should be walking around with a big scarlet letter-type emblem on my chest. (a question mark, in this case). my mind lives in reality, but my heart and hopes are in dream land. sometimes i feel like i barely gain consciousness. which may tribute to my ongoing bad memory. i'm not senile! i just don't remember the things that should be important. my mind dumps them into the "forget this" bin. and so then i'm left wondering. a big question mark on my chest...
i'm really fascinated with the way i work. mentally. like why i do things, think things. i realize (thanks to my interpersonal comm. class) why i do certain physical things, like cross my arms to create barriers. its really not a barrier for me though, more like a comforting position, it means i'm more relaxed. but people perceive it differently.
i think tomorrow i'm going to bring my laptop to my band promo shoot and leave the video camera rolling for forever and post a video! :] yeah. that seems like a good idea...
night all.
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